so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
