Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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