I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
