ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
