I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
