I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
