I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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