Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
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Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
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But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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