Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
