ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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