Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
