Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
