she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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