I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
soo... how was my night?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
