we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Randomize
