Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize