i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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