She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
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I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
my poor anus
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
that may or may not have been my penis.
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