I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Girls should come with a carfax report
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
