No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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