Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize