I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Randomize
