If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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