I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize
