I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
