All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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