We're like a lot better than the average bears
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
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