She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
