we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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