how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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