Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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