Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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