I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
