just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize