he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
