So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
His nipple licking is glorious
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