hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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