How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
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Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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