FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize