i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
