There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize