Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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