You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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