did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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