I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize