Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize