OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
COCAINE IS GR8
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