Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
