You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
