She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
